


Try not to attack your roommate too much, regardless of how frustrated you are. Using the list and notes you made, and possibly in a conversation facilitated by an RA, let your roommate know how you feel. Each is trained to help residents with roommate problems and will know what to do, even if you don't. If you live on campus, talk to your resident adviser or other hall staff member. However, if you don't feel comfortable talking to your roommate directly, that's OK, too. Chances are, your roommate knows that you both need to talk, so give him a few days to compose his thoughts. Set a specific time so that this weekend doesn't come and go without the two of you talking. Ask if you can talk when you are both done with morning classes on Wednesday, for example, or on Saturday at 2 p.m. Once you've figured out the main issues, talk to your roommate at a time that is good for both of you. Something like, "She doesn't respect my space and stuff, even though I've asked her to" might address the problem more specifically and be easier for your roommate to handle. Instead of writing down, "Last week, she ate all of my food AGAIN," try to think about patterns. Is your roommate:įailing to respect your space and/or things?Ĭoming home late and making a lot of noise? Try writing down what is frustrating you the most. In a space other than your room, sit and think about what is really frustrating to you. If your roommate isn't aware of the problem, make sure you know what it is that's really bugging you before you try to address it with him. Things may be tense when the two of you are together in the room conversely, your roommate may have no idea how frustrated you are at how often he finishes off your cereal after rugby practice. If you think you're having roommate problems, one of two things is possible: Your roommate knows it, too, or your roommate is completely clueless. At the same time, these same skills you learn to use may go a long way toward determining if it would be best for each of you to find new roommates. With a little patience and communication, it doesn't have to be the end of the roommate relationship. Roommate conflicts are part of many people's life experiences, and yes they can be incredibly stressful.
